A day to wallow

Today is the Alive Day of a young Air Force EOD officer here. Your Alive Day is the day you were blown to smithereens. You're supposed to mark the occasion annually by doing something. We're not sure what.

"Mississippi" (imagine the lead character in The Hurt Locker, but sane) is choosing to wallow instead of celebrate. He keeps picturing himself blown up one year ago just after he discovered and detonated the big one, but somehow managed to miss the small one nearby. Whoops. That cost him a leg and a half. He saved the life of an Afghan soldier, though, waving him off just in time.

Tragically, two days ago, Mississippi fell off a stationary bike and banged himself up pretty good. So he's not in a good mood anyway.

Mississippi doesn't want a drink to toast his Alive Day. And he wasn't even tempted by a Kit Kat bar. That's just strange.

Maybe this Alive Day sh*t is just over-rated and we should all go back to celebrating our birthdays.